I've been thinking lately about people (and candidates for public office) who seem to think that their choices in life should foisted upon every other citizen (see posts on Rick Santorum, among others).
In the spirit of elaborating on that subject, here's a glimpse of what America would look like if my opinions became the law of the land, in no particular order.
Chick-Fil-A: open on Sundays.
Drugs and prostitution would be legal. Cottage, ricotta and pecorino-romano cheeses would be illegal.
College football would be played year-round and Auburn would be forbidden from participating.
The NBA would be abolished.
The IRS would be abolished. Income tax would be replaced with a national sales tax (I've got some ideas about alleviated this burden on the poor, but I'm not getting into it here).
The Department of Education would be abolished.
Intelligent design would be taught as a concept only in philosophy classes (and believe me, there's a convincing case to be made for it). If you want your kids to learn about Creationism, then take them to Sunday school -- it's not a good idea to force apathetic teachers to school your children in something you consider so important.
Sex education -- with the exception of basic anatomy -- would not be taught in public schools (see above).
The following people would be banned from appearing on television and/or film: William Devane, Brian Dennehy, Richard Thomas, Alex Trebek, Chris Kattan, Rob Schneider and, of course, Oprah.
Lifetime Movie Network (LMN) would show only Meredith Baxter Birney movies with The Betty Broderick Story, Betty Broderick: Her Final Fury, and Kate's Secret in heavy rotation. The Tori Spelling movie Mother, May I Sleep With Danger? would be allowed one showing per month.
The number of federal employees would be cut by at least half.
COEXIST bumper stickers, Jesus fish, Darwin-fish-eating-Jesus-fish, and those stick-figure family stickers would be forbidden. Same goes for decorating your car at Christmas.
Congress would meet once a month for two (2) days. Their salaries would be cut accordingly.
Low-rise and skinny jeans would be illegal.
I'm sure there are a great many other things I could come up with, but this is just a glimpse. So, consider yourselves lucky that a) I will never be elected to anything and b) we do still have enough respect for the Constitution (at the moment) that we wouldn't allow ourselves to be ruled in such a manner.
But do take a moment to think about it every time you hear someone calling for a new law or regulation -- particularly at the federal level. Making new laws should be our last resort to solving problems.
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